This was incredibly helpful and couldn’t have come at a better time—I just stumbled through a major call with a large group. I always struggle to speak up during meetings because I feel like I’m interrupting the extroverts… it’s like I can never find the right moment to jump in, and by the time I’m ready, someone’s already said what I was thinking.
When you mentioned that you “think to speak” rather than “speak to think,” it really hit home. I’ve always felt like I was falling short or maybe even in the wrong field because I’m not naturally outspoken—but your words were so reassuring. My manager does offer advice from time to time, but she’s an extrovert and naturally gifted at speaking off the cuff in large meetings. Her advice has often felt a bit off or overwhelming to me—like it just doesn’t fit—because I’m wired so differently.
I'm so glad it was helpful! I have been in that position so many times, it's always stressful to navigate big group calls. You don't want to be silent and risk looking like you don't have any thoughts or opinions, but you're worried about "wasting" time by voicing an idea that was already said or talking over another potentially good idea (or at least that was my fear)! In times like that I always try to remember what my coach told me about there not being trust without voice. Even if you give an opinion that someone else has already expressed, at least the team knows how you're thinking about things. Or, if it really doesn't feel comfortable to talk on the call, you can always send follow up emails once you've gotten a chance to collect your thoughts and articulate them in a way that you're proud of. But at the end of the day, it's important to also remember that so few people actually remember exactly what was said on these big group calls! Even if you think you're stumbling, I'm almost positive no one else picked up on it. I also really recommend reading the book Quiet by Susan Cain...it REALLY helped me!
'No trust without voice' - I wrote that down and it is so true! I think my fear comes from being misunderstood as well. I ordered that book. Thank you!
This was incredibly helpful and couldn’t have come at a better time—I just stumbled through a major call with a large group. I always struggle to speak up during meetings because I feel like I’m interrupting the extroverts… it’s like I can never find the right moment to jump in, and by the time I’m ready, someone’s already said what I was thinking.
When you mentioned that you “think to speak” rather than “speak to think,” it really hit home. I’ve always felt like I was falling short or maybe even in the wrong field because I’m not naturally outspoken—but your words were so reassuring. My manager does offer advice from time to time, but she’s an extrovert and naturally gifted at speaking off the cuff in large meetings. Her advice has often felt a bit off or overwhelming to me—like it just doesn’t fit—because I’m wired so differently.
Thank you so much!
I'm so glad it was helpful! I have been in that position so many times, it's always stressful to navigate big group calls. You don't want to be silent and risk looking like you don't have any thoughts or opinions, but you're worried about "wasting" time by voicing an idea that was already said or talking over another potentially good idea (or at least that was my fear)! In times like that I always try to remember what my coach told me about there not being trust without voice. Even if you give an opinion that someone else has already expressed, at least the team knows how you're thinking about things. Or, if it really doesn't feel comfortable to talk on the call, you can always send follow up emails once you've gotten a chance to collect your thoughts and articulate them in a way that you're proud of. But at the end of the day, it's important to also remember that so few people actually remember exactly what was said on these big group calls! Even if you think you're stumbling, I'm almost positive no one else picked up on it. I also really recommend reading the book Quiet by Susan Cain...it REALLY helped me!
'No trust without voice' - I wrote that down and it is so true! I think my fear comes from being misunderstood as well. I ordered that book. Thank you!